Boys.. love 'em or at least don't get peed on

Here is the problem. Life is so funny I end up telling Chris all these hilariously true stories and I forget to write them down. Or video them. Like Tate used to have no front teeth, and he gets so giggly when I read funny books, I was going to video him so I could watch it over and over for years to come.... but I got busy laughing and forgot to video. And now his HUGE rabbit-sized adult teeth have come in and all I can think about are how much braces are going to cost us. He still laughs with his whole face, but I'll never get those gummy smile days back. And Sam did this goofy, grinny, little "hi mommy, how did you sweep?" voice in the mornings, and so I made sure the video camera had batteries, but he woke up recently and the little voice is gone. I could've cried. Now its, "The sun is up and I'm hungry." Still good, but where is the blankie-dragging baby? All that about "they grow up so fast" .... I know I will not be able to breathe if Sam ever starts saying "three" correctly. Its still "free," as in "No, I am not four, I think I am free, or maybe six, I don't wemembah." I tried to shove Sam into size 4 footsie pjs last night, but he is just too big. I was starting to panic, pushing his shoulders down and forcing the zipper. He said, "Mom, I think I am just too big for these. I can borrow bubba's." I wanted to scream: "No way mister, you are MY TINY BABY, wemembah?"

But then we also have days like Thursday....

I taught at the college, did one last workout before my half-marathon tomorrow (which we will never speak of again if Micah beats me) and drove home before dark. I was tired, looking forward to egg nog, snuggling time and microwave dinner. As I drove up, I noticed Chris on the roof, putting up a 12x15 tarp. I guess our indoor Niagara Falls days are coming to a close. But its not supposed to rain for days.... After I parked, I heard a booming voice, not exactly friendly, from above: "Sammy peed on the dog. You need to deal with it." As I stood in the driveway, bags in hand, I considered this greeting. Then I heard the dog whimpering from the backyard (she is an inside dog). I yelled up at Chris to come and talk to me for a minute, but he just said, "You need to talk to your kid.... And wash that dog." Then he stomped back over the eave and disappeared.

Tate was jumping on the trampoline, with Sam no where in sight. Tate informed me that Sam was grounded forever and asked if I wanted details. I should've said no. He was good for the play-by-play recap; I almost think he may have rehearsed it:
"Okay, we were jumping together like this (he jumps to show me what he means) and then Dana was under the trampoline down there (he point down as he jumps) and then she came out to chew her bone right there (he points to the NW side, next to the trampoline, still jumping), and then Sam stopped jumping (Tate suddenly stopped, very dramatically) and said 'I am going to pee on Dana now.' (Tate lets his jaw drop as he shakes his head, to demonstrate that he is very upset by this development) and then he just walked to the edge, pulled his pants down and peed on the dog (he points again to the crime scene) and then as Dana started walking away, Sam peed harder and got her more wet." Tate waits to see if I will laugh or cry. I am determined to not show any more emotion concerning Sam and urine. It only seems to encourage him. We have to get to the bottom of this.....

So far, besides the soccer field public peeing incident last spring and the unfortunate Mother's Day extended-family-gathering incident on The Rib Crib's front walk, we've had to endure other urine-related offenses. He peed on Tate's favorite stuffed dog in retaliation for a petty offense, and has aimed at innocent plastic army men when he lost them in a battle. Also, this is really unbelievable, he peed on Tate after he lost a heated verbal exchange. (Although, it is frustrating to argue with Tate. You always loose.) In general, he seems to be missing that part of the brain that warns us that peeing on a person to show dominance in not an accepted practiced in the human race.

Back to the present smelly situation.... Dana was not a stuffed animal, plastic army guys, or even a person who so easily fits into our built-in shower and can shampoo himself. This is my 60+ lb very hairy friend. And all I could think of was that only 72 hours earlier, Sam had been by my side as we washed her. I seemed so ironic......

Monday after work, Dana was certifiably stinky. I had been waiting for the weather to warm a bit to hose her outside. But after a week, I couldn't take another minute. So I gathered up shampoo, wash cloths, conditioner, six full-sized towels, a hair dryer and went to our never-used upstairs guest shower/tub. Never mind its reserved for guests and leaks through the floor somehow (we just try and not think about the water stained ceiling mostly), I'd already determined that the shower stall downstairs was just too tiny. What could I do? It was below 40, and to pay the groomer was over $50, plus I can't get her into a car. Literally. But Sam said he would help. Great. He stood in the tub and waited for her entrance. Long story short(er).... Chris ended up having to get the rope and pull her, choking and gasping, into the bathroom. She's never even been in there before! I had to push her into the tub, and Sam held the rope. We locked the door behind her. I didn't want to clog the drain, so I told Sam to try and pull off wet black hair and set it on the side of the tub. Which is also black. Sam didn't mind, but he was pulling too hard and hurting her. She was miserable. And my "don't worry honey I won't let even one hair go down the drain and Sam will help me" plan of setting the hair on the side of the tub wasn't really working. It was sticking everywhere except the tub: Sam's face, arms, clothes, head.. And we don't have one of those hand-held things, so to wash her I had to position her in the stream of water by shoving her in and holding her down, while Sam, also getting wet, scrubbed. The amount of black hair was staggering. I didn't know how to contain it. But them I had a grand idea -- A lint brush! I keep them everywhere, but the only one I wanted to send my little hairy wet guy to retrieve was in my car. So while he ran down, I held Dana. When he returned and handed it to me, I loosened my grip in order to turn and figure out where to start rolling, and she made a break... one jump out of the tub, slipping on the tile, banging into the cabinet, crashing into the door, slamming a large wet dog print on the hallway wall and tripping and dripping down our carpet stairs. Then she did it..... she shook over and over and over and over and over.... all over downstairs, running in mad circles as she did. Tate screamed and went into the bedroom, locking himself away. Chris was still on the roof, looking to never be seen again. Sam was singing upstairs, back in the shower, I guess no longer on the "help mom wash the dog committee." I tripped back upstairs and grabbed the towels and hairdryer, and went downstairs to at least fix my terrified dog. The house will be..... ignored until no children or large animals live here. 30 minutes later, I had a glossy, show-ready puppy, asleep on my bed, content and warm. ....... Ahhhhh, now time for egg nog.

Where is Sam? OH NO!! The water was still running upstairs! I ran back up and there SWAM Sam, in black, hairy, chunky, smelly DEEP and wavy water, still clothed, joyfully kicking as hard as he could, flinging black hair and murky water all over the entire bathroom.

I think the dog has been easier to keep clean this week, even after two showers. Luckily, on Thursday the dog shampoo and lint brush were still in the upstairs bathroom.

Puppy Potty Training

Remember our puppy? The dog-lover who decided to buy a EXTRA LARGE BREED DOG the last week of July promptly revealed that he actually had no idea how to do anything with a puppy, so I could just handle all that. (Yes, I am speaking of my handsome hubby) "After all, Katie, you have trained two of your own puppies before. And you do like to read and research, so this would be like a fun little new project for you. You aren't even working this August!" So fifteen library books and three videos later, I had a plan.

We named her "Dana" for Mt. Dana in Yosemite. It is the largest mountain around that area (over 14K) and Chris and I hiked it over Labor Day 1998, when we fell in love and decided to get married (yes, all in the same weekend, ten days after we met). We've never been back and so just thinking about Mt Dana makes us sigh... Good dog name. While I was floating in the fuzzy bliss of intoxicating puppy breath and memories of hiking/ planning a wedding, Chris decided that he needed to "take a vacation" to Dallas with his college buddies for a long weekend. Of course, Dear. No problem, Dear. You should go to Dallas, I would be happy to handle the puppy. (Never mind I did change my mind within 24 hours - before he left even - but it was too late. "Let your yes be yes.....") Do you have any idea how much a 43 lb dog can pee? It is truly amazing.

By the time Chris arrived home from his "vacation," I had used over two bottles of carpet cleaner, scraped up about 45 pounds of dog poo, washed four loads of towels used to dry the puppy after her baths, scrubbed and disinfected the crate multiple times, called and left several nasty messages on Chris' cell phone, threatened to take the dog to the pound, cried a river, and called to scream at my sister (former vet assistant) to come and PICK UP CHRIS' DOG!! and keep her - for $25 a day - until further notice. Why in the world did I think this would be fun?

The dog did eventually get the hang of relieving herself outdoors, just like everyone said she would. My sister picked up some extra cash for her boarding services, and Chris and I are still married. But I did say NO!! when he suggested that Dana would be much happier if one of her siblings came to live with us.

Now the current debate: to fix or not to fix the female pure bred? Tate has conducted a street survey, and the vote (according to Tate), is 67 for NOT fixing so we can have puppies next year, 1 for controlling the pet population (yours truly), and 1 abstaining (Grandma Faye refused to cast a vote after I gave her a stern glare).

Stay tuned!

Sammy and Dana goin' fishin' in our koi pond.

A Great Day!

We had the BEST day yesterday!

For starters, yes, Sam is still puzzle King! Here he is dancing after an "advanced" puzzle. With no help!
We had a yummy lazy summer breakfast. The boys have taken to scooting their chairs all the way around the table so they can both sit right next to Daddy and talk.
Now, here is where it starts getting really good! Yesterday was the last day of my college summer class, the last day of the boys' once-a-week-during-the-summer-day-camp, AND the final day of Tate's week-long super intense competitive soccer camp! Whew! Lots going on! Chris picked me up for a romantic celebration lunch while the boys were bowling/painting at camp, and told me that we were getting a dog! Yeah! We've talked about it for nearly 11 years, but we finally did it! We picked the boys up from camp together and told them we had a great surprise!

We wanted a female Burnese Mountain Dog, and there was a litter Chris has been following only a couple of hours from our house!
Can you tell which one we picked?
Here is the proud papa, with his 11 week, 20 pound girl, on the way to show her off out our first outing...

Tate's final night of soccer camp! Unfortunately, she didn't feel like walking a half-mile to the fields in 100 degree heat. She laid down and wouldn't be moved. So......

Chris got to carry his big "baby" all the way, while Sam, unhappy at losing his free ride, complained.

Once I got the soccer fans set up, I tried to get as many pictures as I could of my little soccer star.
However, he is far too serious to pose for me!
He is in the white jersey with the blue socks and purple shorts on the right side of the huddle. This was during a drill.

Look at his cute "team" uniforms! His team was "Spain."
Mom, please. We are trying to get ready for the tournament.

To make a very exciting night a little shorter, Tate's team (which was co-ed mixed ages, with Tate being hands-down the smallest and least experienced) made it through the first round of the "World Cup," barely. The team never complained when Tate got the only foul (hands on a punt) or missed tackles or kicked the ball away from his own player. He cheered for everyone and never even understood the tournament brackets, even at the end. He was having the time of his life. I just prayed he wouldn't loose it for them, and not cry when they got kicked out. (There is lots of intensity in competitive soccer with kids, as we are finding out). Well, they made it through round two, beating the second placed team. Then round three! Then they were in the final World Cup! Tate was so excited! It came down to the last 45 seconds, still no score, when the big girls scored one against Brazil, for the win! It was pandemonium folks! We were jumping and screaming! Sam was so excited for 'brudder,' and I was excited for Tate to have such a great experience! I missed all the great team photos, since I was so enthusiastic, but here is one of the kids dumping water on the student "coach."

We went home exhausted, and slept hard (of course after Tate called everyone he could think of to tell them he won the world cup in soccer!).

Today... we spent all day loving on puppy. Aunt Miranda and Uncle Matt came to meet their new "niece" and kept saying how big she is... (Look at those paws!)

So Sam laid down next to her and they both stretched out.. turns out, Sam is right! He is the biggest!

This is living!!